actually, I'm a sock model
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
