Will you blow on my dice?
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize