is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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