Porn is love you can see.
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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