Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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