I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
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