Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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