Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Did you pee in the oven last night??
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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