speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I'm both gender and math confused
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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