but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize
