She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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