So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
