dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
