cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Found your dick twin last night
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
