i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
