i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
