We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
