Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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