Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
