You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
