he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
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