Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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