I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize