please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
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