Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
