just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
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