Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
The beer is more important than you right now.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
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