you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Randomize
