so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
