She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I faked an abortion last night.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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