What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
