you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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