She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
