perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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