we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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