All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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