Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
