i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
