My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
