i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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