so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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