Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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