I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
