Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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