theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
