i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
