Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
