put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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