so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
