I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
